Hi Everyone,
OMG my SINCEREST apologies for letting it be so long since I have written to ya'll. This holiday season was OMG OMG soooooooooooooooooo busy that I just didn't have the time to keep up, but I PROMISE that wont be a prob anymore. So lets grab a cuppa coffee and chat a bit shall we. :)
Not really sure where to begin, so I will just start in here and let my mind take us from here, there, and yonder and see where we end up.....LOL. We didn't get a white Christmas for Christmas day, however we DID get a pretty good snow just after Christmas (about 6-8 inches). It was pretty but OMG not real easy to get around in. A REALLY close family member of mine had a heart cath like 4 days before Christmas which sent me into OMG stress mode. It was actually kinda weird cause usually I dont go into freakout mode till after the situation is over and done with. LOL.....THAT sounded really weird didn't it. Usually I am the type when a serious situation comes up I keep most of my emotions tucked up under my sleeve (out of the way I guess). I go into the situation with the "keep it calm for everyone, do what you can do, what needs to be done, pick up the slack for peeps when they just cant do it (wether that means physcially or emotionally cannot do things). Then when the storm has settled and everything is said and done THAT is when I sit at the kitchen table over coffee alone (or with a trusted friend) and have my cry. It was just really weird for me, cause for some reason right at that point I just couldn't be as strong as I needed to be. Thankfully, everything is ok and there are no blockages and my family member is doing great, but still it REALLY bothers me to this day that I couldn't keep my emotions in check.
Christmas was amazing this year. We have been tight on money for a bit now. Not like OMG we are gonna die, but alot tighter than normal. I was able to get the kids some presents with the gift cards that I earned thru swagbucks, but I wasnt able to get the clothes that I know they need. But the Lord REALLY took care of us. See before the Christmas break from school I found a note in the kid's backpack asking for their sizes in clothes. I REALLY didn't think anything of it. It was a handwritten note, and I assumed they were going thru the lost and found boxes at school and trying to match up the articles to the kids they belonged to (our school does this from time to time throughout the year). Well.....then 2 days before the kids got out for Christmas break the school secretary sent a note home saying that I needed to come to the office and to bring Jay with me. OMG I thought someone was in trouble. So we went in and our school secretary had a HUGE smile on her face. She told us to hang in the office for a min and she would be right back. She came back with 2 HUGE bags and said "Merry Christmas......these are for the kids, we want you to put these under your tree from Santa for the kids" OMG OMG I started crying RIGHT then and there (yeah told you my emotions have been playing with me). We put them under the tree.....BUT they were already wrapped so we didn't know what they were till Christmas day. OMG OMG O M G!!!!!! Each of my kids got a HUGE box of clothes that FIT. Then Josie got a big stuffed bear and Toby got a remote control monster truck. Yeah, me and Jay both got REALLY teary-eyed (we didnt want to cry in front of the kids, but we couldnt help it). I cannot express the gratitude I feel for all the people that helped us out when we REALLY needed it.
I got another surprise the day after Christmas from some of our friends that live in Chicago (about 4 hours north of us, depending on how fast you drive). They told Jay that they had a scooter that wasnt being used, and they wanted to bring it down for me. Ok here is the thing though.......he thought it would be a great scooter that I would be able to go outside with.....which is AWESOME..........BUT when they got here we realized it is actually a powerchair. OMG A POWERCHAIR.....I CAN USE INDOORS AND OUT. I'm not sure they realized what this really means for me. See now I can get around on the main floor of my home. I can sweep my kitchen, mop, cook, clean, go outside, go to grandma and grandpa's next door, walk the kids up to the park, go out and get the mail and I can do this ALL BY MYSELF. No one has to help me AT ALL. I was so shocked that I really couldnt convey my feelings to them at the time. But when they left I just LITERALLY broke down crying. Seriously people I poured a glass of kool-aid and took it in the living room all by myself, no one had to help carry it, no one had to open the fridge door for me, I did it on my own. Not sure if they realize it or not, but the Lord used them as angels that day, and I am forever grateful to those 2 sweet men that saw a problem and came to my rescue.
Now we are still going to get the wheelchair so that I can also use it when we cannot bring the powerchair places. And we are also going to use that on the 2nd floor of our home. We are working on a way to get me up the stairs easier....and then once I am on the 2nd floor I can transfer to the chair and be able to work on the rest of the house. Jay is just AMAZED. He told me "it is like you are alive again". My downstairs is totally caught up and I have been able to keep it up everyday. I am cooking most of our meals again, and even fixing special treats that without my powerchair would just simply be impossible for me to do. OMG can you imagine the things I will be able to do with and for my family when summer hits. We can actually plan the weekend getaway that we have wanted for the past 2 summers (going to st. louis to the zoo, science center, arch, and union station). None of this was possible before, it was all just a dream that I could not give to my kids because I could not get around. Now not only is this possible, but will be a reality in a few short months. I still have alot of pain BUT it is not compounded by trying to hobble around the house, and it is much more manageable. I am not sure if anyone else can see this, but I myself can notice a difference in my overall mental well-being. It sounds strange, but I guess things dont look as hopeless to me. I'm not stuck on the couch for days on end, and I can contribute to my household......its like i'm really a wife and mommy again. And it makes me feel so relieved that this takes ALOT off of Jay's plate. He can walk in from work to a clean house and not hafta worry about just getting off work to come home to have to help me with a bunch of stuff. He can sit down and relax knowing that I have 99% of the housework covered.
Well.....I ment for this post to be a bit longer, as I have ALOT still left to talk about, but the babies will be walkin in from school here in just a min and I need to get snacks ready. But I promise I will post more later this evening or tomorrow. Thanks for listening my peeps **SMOOOOOOOCHIES**
